Motivations behind the youth soccer player...why do they play?

Most often kids start to play sports because their parents sign them up for exercise, socialization, and fun...but why do they continue to play is my question?
 
With my U-9 team, it is already pretty clear to me who is naturally talented, who has potential, and who will probably never play past the age of 11.  All of that is expected at this age group, kids are playing for fun, or so I hope!  At that age, in my opinion, it is okay if a player does a cartwheel on her way to a water break.  It is okay that between drills they fight over the ball and kick and run all over the field.  It is even okay, that sometimes they just want to take a break from soccer and work on a team cheer : )

NY Kosmos, making tunnel of cheers for opposing team post game.

When my sisters and I started to play soccer at the ages of 6, 8, and 11 our parents had one rule, "Play until it is no longer fun."  For me the fun has yet to stop, for my sisters it changed with they were introduced to other sports but the rule was the same for us all.  We did not play soccer, or any sport for that matter, for our parents.  My father played sports growing up but at no time did we ever feel he was living vicariously through us.  In my 25+ years in the soccer community, I now have an even greater appreciation for that family rule and wish more kids had that rule to follow.

Training a new U-16 team has been one of the biggest challenges I have ever faced.  I was thrilled to work with a team that I thought would have the same desire and intensity I had at that age.  I thought that their desire to play post high school would encourage them to push themselves to the highest level at all times.  Turns out I was wrong.  After further discussion, most told me they play because "my dad grew up playing" or my "mom played college sports and wants me to", or "I want a scholarship".  

Those "motivations" are not really motivations at all.  I believe it is impossible to compete at your best when you are not doing it first for yourself!  Growing up with the rule of " having fun", was often interpreted differently by me and my sisters, for instance one day I was pitching on my 6th grade softball team and I walked about 12 players in a row.  I started to cry when the inning finally ended and my dad said "Grab your glove you just quit" and I said "No! I am having fun" through my pathetic tears.  Losing that game was a good life lesson for me at the ripe old age of 11, haha.  Was I really having fun? See to me, having fun means winning, and if I wasn't winning I was the BIGGEST sore loser.  Turns out a lot of people share in that theory with me but over the years I also learned that a lot of people don't.  

So heads up to you coaches and parents who push kids to play more than they want for an outcome that they don't really are about...just having fun isn't a bad goal to have either. : )